Our last journey-Part 2

10 March 08

We were panicked , stunned and it was all chaos. I knew abah had stroke by looking his physical reaction and I was standing in front of him. I saw his eyes slowly shut. I wonder if I was the last image he saw. Ayu checked Abah's pulse and she said there were none. Mama suddenly said, CPR! CPR!. None of us actually knew how to do CPR and thank god there was Ayu who is a medic student. In the meantime, Fadhli called the ambulance. As what we always watched the 911 TV programme, it happened exactly like that. The operator gave us advice on what to do and just within 10 minutes we could heard the sirens. Then only we put off the phone and the paramedic take charge. As I remembered, there were 2 ambulans, 1 paramedic car and 1 fireman were in front of the house. The paramedic manager, Craig explain us of what s the procedure and starts asking us few questions. After few procedures, abah pulse were back and we were relieved but the feeling of looking him lying motionless is unbearable. After the paramedic stabilized his pulse and heart rate, they brought him in the ambulans. Me, Pojee, E-am, Ayu and Fadhli jumped into the car and rush to the hospital leaving mama with the ambulans. We just want to reach there fast. While we were on the way there, I received a sms from Mama "Patah balik, Abah kena heart attack lagi". Masyallah.

My world turns dark.

It took us 15 minutes to go back home and once we were there the ambulans are about to move. Mama said the pulse is stabilized again. I know Abah is fighting. He is a strong man. He is my hero.



When we reached Royal Melbourne Hospital, we were put on waiting in the waiting room near the ER. An ER doctor came to us and explain what happen. I could never forget the word he said " He had a massive heart attack and most of the patients who experience this wont survive". Allahu Akbar. We tried to console our heart saying that Abah is a strong man, he will fight and he will not gave up.

After few hours waiting there, the ER doctor told us that he will be placed Abah in ICU. A doctor from the ICU greet and explain us again of what had happened. We were very well informed of whats going on.

Abah was transfered to ICU on the same night. Once he was all prepared, we were allowed to see him. Abah was placed in a special room in the ICU. Isolated from the rest and he was attached with a huge machine behind him. I saw few rack of drugs and tube attached to his veins. Apalah yang terdaya lagi untuk kami lakukan hanya berdoa kepada Allah.



11 March 08

We slept at the waiting room near the ICU. It was a long night. Sleepless night. Mama tak henti-henti berzikir. Al Fatihah was on my lips all the time. Doctors were walking in and out from the ICU. It looks like my fav series "House", where few doctors will work as a team and brainstorm of what to do next. We then were called in a private room and were introduced to few people. One of them is Mark. He is the person who will be helping us and act as a middle person. I would say he is the PR of this situation. Then there's another doctor who explain us the situation again and what were their expectations. It was more on waiting game. They would like to see if Abah is responding today. And again the word of "not survived bang on our head".
The doctor advised us to expect the worst since Abah brain did not received enough oxygen and therefor the are high possibility of a brain damage. How bad it is, they can only tell by his responds later.



So we wait for miracles to happen. Nobody knows how hard was the feeling at time. We were crying high and low. Dont know what to do. We are a strangers in a foreign land. No familiar faces, no friends to talk to and no family to lend a shoulder.
It was tough. Ya Allah ya tuhanku, kuatnya dugaanmu ini.

On Allah will, we received a visitor named Kak Aida or most people call her Ummi. She's a johorian who lived in Melbourne for more that 35 years. Her presence is like an angel to us. She brought few Malaysian and Singaporean to visit us and Abah in ICU. Totally strangers came and pray for Abah. The news spread and we received lots of Malaysian students and even sms praying for him.

As only two person allowed to be inside the room, we took turns to be with Abah. I still can remember the time I touch his hand, kiss his forehead and pray Ashadu allah ilahhai allah on his ears. Sayangnya abah...
I asked the nurse if he could listened me, she said they wouldnt know...but it helps if you could talk to him.

While reciting Yassin, I hold his hand gently and prayed that he could just moved his finger. But there s still no responds.

At times when I'm alone with him, I would talk to him how much I love him. How he is so special in my heart. I told him that he has been a great father and I could never asked for more. He gave me so much joy and happiness being the daughter of Rahime. I'm proud to have him as my father. and I love him so dearly... Deep inside my heart, I know I will loose him.

His life support is helping him well breathing. But he is in a coma state. And waiting is what we do. Sabar itu separuh daripada iman...

12 March 08

The doctor and nurses advice us to have a proper sleep at home and take a good rest. So we did. It was still a sleepless night but i did my zikir until i fall asleep. Suddenly, I heard a phone rang. My heart stopped when the caller told me "Ms Nazura, we would advise you to come over to the ICU. Your father's situation is not good". Me and my mom rushed over to the hospital. When we reached there, the doctor explained to us the situation. It seems that abah had another heart attack whereby without any sign the heart just stopped. The doctor said that its unfair to the body if they keep on doing the CPR and all other rescue procedures since he had gone through so much. So what they did was, they would let him go gradually without doing anything. If he recover, he would recover naturally without anymore drugs support and if he would go, then he would go naturally when the time comes.

I shook my head and tried to digest all the words that came from the doctor. It was hard. All of us cried. "Ya Allah, kuatkanlah semangat kami untuk mengharungi dugaanmu ini".

So we started calling family and friends updating the situation. It was the hardest phone call I ever make to all my aunties, uncles and Abah's friends. A lot of people broke down hoping to see him for the last time.

Kepadanya kita datang dan kepadanya kita dikembalikan.

Around 7:45pm (Melbourne time), Allah datang menjemput Abah dan dia menyambutnya dengan penuh ketenangan. Kami dengan redha menerima ketentuan Allah ini. Muka Arwah Abah bersih dan berseri-seri...takkan kami lupa wajah itu sehingga akhir hayat kami.

Damailah Abah disana...Satu hari nanti, jika diizikan Allah, kita pasti akan bersua jua.