What a great Partayy!--click here to see more photos!

Syhhh it s a surprise

A trip to remember

Just got back from our hometown, Kota Bharu. E-am tag along with us and as expected he had few episode of self demonstration at the airport, market and few other places.Muka akak ni dah taktau tebal mana dah... Sabar je lah. But most of all, we had fun. Me and mama were laughing all the way watching e-am in action. Nantilah ada masa , I ll tell you more stories of this trip.

Mama and E-am looks great.

We are different, yet we are alike

Courage

What Is Courage
Brenda Wiseman, R.N.,C.

Have you ever wondered where people get the COURAGE to deal with life's adversities? Reflecting on your own life, perhaps you have questioned the source of your personal courage. Talking with people in the clinic each day, I am struck by the incredible courage of our patients and their families.

In exploring the definition of courage, I was reminded that courage is NOT the absence of fear. It is a quality of mind which meets danger or opposition with valor, firmness and bravery. This definition still seems inadequate to describe the reflection in the eyes of people who frequent this clinic. Upon further exploration, I learned that the French root word of courage is coeur which means heart. The heart as the sustaining source of courage... Courage that is "rooted" in love. This definition brought clarity to the reflection seen in the eyes of those living with cancer and their loved ones.

In 1534 Martin Luther was quoted (in preface to his translation of the Psalms) "The human heart is like a ship on a stormy sea driven about by winds blowing from all four corners of heaven." Cancer is certainly one of the stormiest seas of life, and it calls for courage in both aspects of its definition: firmness in the presence of danger and heart in the form of love.

As I look at cancer patients and their loved ones, I see that love seems to be the essential ingredient to propel us in life and the fundamental source of courage.

A song for Mama

I remember singing this to mama through the phone while I was away. It really suits to what I felt about my mama.
Hope one day, E-am will be singing me this song too :)

You taught me everything
And everything youve given me
I always keep it inside
Youre the driving force in my life, yeah
There isnt anything
Or anyone I can be
And it just wouldnt feel right
If I didnt have you by my side
You were there for me to love and care for me
When skies were grey
Whenever I was down
You were always there to comfort me
And no one else can be what you have been to me
Youll always be you always will be the girl
In my life for all times

Chorus:
Mama, mama you know I love you
Oh you know I love you
Mama, mama youre the queen of my heart
Your love is like
Tears from the stars
Mama, I just want you to know
Lovin you is like food to my soul
Youre always down for me
Have always been around for me even when I was bad
You showed me right from my wrong
Yes you did
And you took up for me
When everyone was downin me
You always did understand
You gave me strength to go on
There was so many times
Looking back when I was so afraid
And then you come to me
And say to me I can face anything
And no one else can do
What you have done for me
Youll always be
You will always be the girl in my life

i cried.

Emotion swings

Its hard to describe my feelings right now. At times, I'm on top of my positive energy and at times I'm drifting apart. Ya Allah, kuatkanlah semangat ku ini. Time is like so precious to me right now. Juggling myself as a mother, daughter, wife and an employer is very challenging for me. There's no time to be selfish, all I can think right now is to accomodate as much as I can to every responsibilities. I thank you for those who have been helping and supporting me in many aspects. From helping me taking care of E-am at the office to giving me the oppurtanity to spend time with Mama. You know who you are.I thank you very much.
Mama had gone through her second chemo last week and now recovering the side effects. In another 2 weeks time, she ll be doing her third chemo again. Hmmm..another disaster routine to go. But Mama is hanging there, firm and tawakal. Ya Allah, panjangkanlah masa Mama bersama kami, berikanlah mama kekuatan, berikanlah kami sekeluarga kekuatan untuk menerima dugaanmu ini...

No more tears

Yes,no more tears. No more kesian mama. No more all the negative thoughts.Guys,if i ever talk about negative stories..knock me on head ya!hehheheh...
From today, I wish to remain as positive as i can be. After all that's what i ve been taught since small. All these dugaan from Allah is for a reason. One of the reason is for me to tawakal, menerima takdir dan qada & qadar.But at the same time berikhtiar and not to give up hope. Thank you Azrai&Sity for introducing me to 'the secret'book. It really makes me feel good and I'm trying my very best to be a positive thinker. I think everybody should read this book.It educate us on how we actually can heal our self and to achieve anything that we want by controlling our mind.And of course besides this, we will always look for the best treatment to fight cancer. And if we do not find it, just have laugh.After all, laughter is the best medicine and its free!
I would like to thank you for all the support/prayers for my mama.Mudah-mudahan dengan berkat doa kalian, dapat melegakan dan memberi semangat untuknya.aminn..
Mama is doing great for the past few days. Some people don't even believe that she got cancer in her.She eats well, she laugh , she's just like herself.But at times, when some visitor/caller who don't know how to react to cancer patient,will actually torn her into pieces again. Hmmm...therefor, i wish to share on how we can help cancer patient to fight this.
1.Let us not mention they are a cancer patient.Name them 'CANCER SURVIVOR'.
2.Instead of talking about their sickness, talk about happy/inspired stories or any issue that got nothing to do with cancer.
3.Act normal.Don't pity them.Be happy.
4.Bring your positive energy her that's the least you can do.

Its not how long you live, it's how well you live you life.
insyallah....

good day ahead

There are good days and bad days with cancer. Today i would say, its a good day so far.It give me a great pleasure when i manage to make mama smile. A laughter is like a bonus to me. E -am is my tool to make mama forget all her sadness.I'm reading 'Healing cancer emotionally ' by a psychiatrist specialised in cancer patients.Mama said she wants to go for a holiday next week. Yey! She's taking the next step and I'm very happy.hmm...nak gi mana yek?

Everything happen for a reason

After mama's 4th day of her chemo, life have been challenging for everyone of us especially mama.Most of the time she's tired and fall asleep for few hours(this is very rare for her).Everytime i see her, i know dia tak putus-putus berzikir...She's been crying a lot...more than i ever knew her.At times, while we just have a simple conversation, she will cry.Abah can't sleep at night.I know he's worried.Me?Its a lie if i say everything is ok. I do have my breakdown at times.But I try my best not to breakdown in front of mama. I know everything happen for a reason. Pasti ada hikmah di sebalik ujian Allah ini.

Dear Friends,

For those who know personally my mom, last 2 days she was diagnosed as a cancer patient. Tomorrow she ll start her first chemo session. I hope all of us would pray for her to face all the challenge and mudah-mudahan dengan berkat doa semua, dia dipanjangkan umur.aminnn...
And as for now, i ll devote all my time for my dear mama.I might not write too often but i ll update when i have free time.

i like to take a quote from kak intan,

orang dapat cancer adalah insan terpilih
Allah pilih untuk hampir kepadanya
untuk bersedia menjadi kekasih dia
InsyaAllah

and Azrai also gave me a good advice on positive thinking

If we were to fake our positive mind, then be it.
Remove physiological stress from the body,
and the body does what it was designed to do.
It heals itself.
Insyallah

*Kak Intan and Azrai is a daughter and son of a fighter in cancer.

Not everyday you see a multitasking man

While I'm having my breakfast at Ampang Puteri yesterday,sitting beside my table was a man with his daughter.What caught my attention was his ability of doing few things at one time. Well, if its the mothers it wont bother me that much.This man probably in his early 30s, having nasi lemak while holding his daughter on his lap.And beside that he is also feeding his daughter while reading a newspaper.fuyoh! 4 perbuatan dalam satu masa. cayalah bang!i salute you!

Good books are the warehouses of ideas -H. G. Wells-

MUST READ BOOKS FOR ALL WORKING WOMAN ESPECIALLY WITH KIDS

CHICKEN SOUP FOR WORKING WOMAN SOUL

*It will definately relief all your stress/tiredness/pressure

Ikon Malaysia Semi Final

For those who miss this show, enjoy!



Yup, they've made it to the FINAL KONSERT.Congrats!

happy birthday

A Special World

A special world for you and me
A special bond one cannot see
It wraps us up in its cocoon
And holds us fiercely in its womb.

Its fingers spread like fine spun gold
Gently nestling us to the fold
Like silken thread it holds us fast
Bonds like this are meant to last.

And though at times a thread may break
A new one forms in its wake
To bind us closer and keep us strong
In a special world, where we belong.

Happy Birthday, my dear sili
You are always young at heart!

You rock man!

Check out Mr Pojee performing with his VI band together with Flop Poppy in Ikon Malaysia this Saturday 830pm.


Sorry for the bad photo.Was too excited watching my sili...:P anyway..kalau nampak dia yang belah kanan sekali tu. I m so proud of you !


me and andy

SAWADIKAPP!

I ll be away to Bangkok from 5 July-9 July.

Making Memories

On my previous entree,

In another 2 weeks time, I ll be leaving to Singapore and try to breakaway from my work. We decide not to bring E-am as its more like a bussiness affair for me and pojee. I know I will miss him soo much but I dont want to drag him to the expo and make myself and pojee go mad pleasing him.

WE DECIDE TO BRING E-AM TO SINGAPORE AND NO REGRETS ABOUT IT!


I m so glad to we decide to bring this little creature along with us in Singapore. I HAD A BLAST with e-am there. It was a split decision actually...hehehe.last minute decision with a condition if Tok Ma(my mama) coming, then E-am is coming too! After few days of thinking(tok ma pon suspen nak travel ngan e am), finally tok ma said YES! heheheh thanks mama...we are making memories with e am this time.



E am toksah cakap la kan, excited yang tak terkata. We even prepared ourselves mentally and physically for this trip. Besides our personal stuff, I packed along some of his fav toys and also a portable DVD player with his fav DVD (my son is easily bored ok, so need to have lots of backup plan)
We also decide not to stay in Singapore hotels as the rate is like double/triple for the original fair due to the broadcast asia week. I would rather spend those money in shopping rather than sleeping in 3star hotel for RM500 per day. So we spend 3 nites in Bluewave Hotel in Johor with RM370/nite for family suite. Excellent!
I would like to share some happy/funny/unforgetable moments during this trip:



• the first time e am enter the hotel, he gone mad! He is running round and round the suite. Masuk bilik kluar bilik, masuk toilet klua toilet, bukak almari, masuk almari. Peti ais pon dia bukak. tgk cermin cakap sorang2. pastu when he went to the living room with a 'WOW' expression...adehlaaa budak nih. Bukak tingkap he said 'CC!' (KLCC) padahal nampak bandar johor jek...hahhaha

• In singapore, there's a lot of car similar to manggis mobil. Everytime he saw that kind of car, he'll say 'GANGGISH!'...

• In Vivocity, there's a lot of water feature around the mall. He said 'Mummy, mummy.. swim, swim!'. Adeilaaa...aku macam marathon kejar dia nak terjun dlm water sculpture/fountain.

• On his first time ride on MRT, he were so excited he's finally on a train. Mula-mula naik, he closed his ears sebab bunyi kuat sangat and yang paling horor skali when we need to change the train, he is crying like mad.nangis macam dah kena tinggal train..satu station tengok...grrrr...saba je lah!

-I think this incident is the most unforgettable.
Imagine this:
On our way back from Singapore, we stop by at the 7eleven to buy some drinks.Elok je Pojee turun keter, my 'anak bertuah ni' terus je melompat ke driver seat.Tengah elok-elok dia berangan-angan bawak keter, bapak dia datang lalu terkejut lah anak bertuahku ini. Terus dia melompat menyelamatkan diri daripada kena marah ngan abah dia. Dalam dok dia melompat tu, kaki cik e am ni macam terlanggar kat gear keter, I tot tade apa lah kan...sikit je.Bila Pojee nak masuk gear je, tak bleh masuk..apa lagiiiii(as we all know pojee) mengamok lah dia! Antara ayat2 yang aku ingat Pojee marah anak bertuah dia nih is' Apa dah e am buat kat kete abah nih?habis takleh masuk gear!rosak dah kete nih!cable tercabut nih!' Sambil terpinga-pinga cik e am nengok abah dia ngamok dia ckp 'mummy..mummy,roshakk(rosak) aaa.babutttt(cabut)....pastu Pojee sebok dok telepon orang nak tanya camne nak setel, panic dengan telepon ke sana ke mari...datang je abah dia masuk kete, cik e am cakap ' Abah..... lagu?' Ada hati lagi tuuu mintak laguuu setelah abah dia ngamok...aku n mama ketawa sampai kuar air mata masa tu .....i can even laugh until now thinking of that


I'm so glad that I'm making all this wonderful memories with my dear son. I enjoy every minute of our time together.Children they are tend to be annoying and distracting at times but we need to enjoy this moment while we can.In another 20 years he probably wont even need you this much.
My new self discover : I discover this making memories can be done anywhere, anytime. You just need to realise and embrace the moment !

Bonjour!

Wahaaa...I finally finished reading 'Weekend in Paris' by Robyn Sisman after 2 weeks reading.Phewww...

Synopsis:
It only takes a weekend to change your life!

Weekend in Paris is the story of Molly Clearwater, a well-read 21-year-old country girl who's never done anything exciting or dramatic-until now.

One Friday afternoon, smarting from her boss's taunt that she's "just a secretary," Molly quits her job and boards the Eurostar for Paris. Within hours of arriving in the bewitching world of leafy boulevards, luscious foods and crazy traffic, she's a woman transformed. A real femme sauvage! Soon she's racing along the Seine on the back of a scooter with her cheek laid against the warm back of a smouldering Frenchmen, infiltrating a conference in a Cleopatra wig, and sharing with a complete stranger her deepest, darkest secret. By Sunday night, after a dizzying carousel-ride of passion, excitement and self-discovery, Molly's a new person.

My Review:
Its light and easy reading and quite adventurous. But it's too much of goody, fantasy and too easy to predict. It's suitable for teenagers who seek for their true identity in life. Maybe, if I'm in that category, i might enjoy it then...oops, I sounds OLD.
GRRRR