40 Days

How fast time flies... Today mark 40 days after Arwah Abah left us. I thought I was getting over it quite well but today it just feel like saying goodbye for the second time to him. It feels the same as the first farewell that we had 40 days back in Melbourne.
I had tears all over me which I don't know why. Strange. I thought. since almost everyday I recite yassin and tahlil in front of his grave but it's exceptional for today. While reciting zikir Allahuakbar with my eyes shut, my tears falls. Today, the roof that have been protecting the grave was moved to the other as if it symbolized that he is ready to rest in peace. As what I understand from some hadis saying that in the period of 40 days, the soul will come and visit his love ones. To see wether are they praying for them and to bid the final farewell. Deep inside me, I know Arwah Abah did come and visit us. I can feel it and even had dreamt on him. I dreamt meeting him and asking him how is he. And with a gleaming smile he said that he's ok. I recall that in that dream he looks younger.
Today we did a Tahlil at the house. Alhamdullilah, almost 100 people came with doa for Arwah. I did a surprised gift for all Arwah Abah's siblings by giving them a photo journal that captured their memories from Abah's childhood days, his college years, family years, umrah and haji trips, the day that I got married, the day he had his first grandchild and the last journey that we had in Melbourne. Many of them had tears in their eyes. I had a tough time designing the journal as it took me days to finish it. Each page was design with tears and flashback memories. It s a very personal work of art.

As the days goes by, I wish I can move forward with my journey of life. But I shall not forget my dear Abah. I hope all my prayers will be his companion in his journey to meet Allah SWT.

First Time Fajitas

Just a quick note on my accomplishment of making chicken fajitas for the first time. It taste so good... kenapa? Tak percaya ke...

Teratak kami bagaikan bercahaya dengan kehadiran mereka

Alhamdullilah, syukur...Hajat Kak Mimi & Abg Didi terlaksana sudah untuk mengadakan majlis pembacaan dan khatam al quran buat Arwah Abah. Tak terkata betapa terharunya perasaan kami sekeluarga menyambut kedatangan lebih 40 orang pelajar-pelajar tahfiz ke teratak kami. Melihat air muka semua anak-anak ini, terbayang betapa sejuknya perut ibu yang mengandung anak-anak tahfiz ini. Kami menjemput mereka di Masjid Ulu Klang selepas waktu Isyak. Melihat kelibat anak-anak yang siap memakai jubah putih berserban, sambil tersemat al quran didada mereka, aduhh...hatiku tersentuh. Alangkah baiknya kalau arwah dapat melihat mereka ini. Datang dengan niat yang suci murni buat seseorang yang mereka tidak kenali.

Ada beberapa perkara buat renungan bersama:

Sketsa 1

Setelah selesai majlis, kami menyerahkan beberapa buah tangan buat pelajar Tahfiz. Kebetulan aku terdengar perbualan mereka.

Pelajar Tahfiz 1: Eh dapat apa dlm bag tu?

Pelajar Tahfiz 2: Dapat Quran aaa...(dengan nada gembira mereka berlalu)

Terdapat banyak lagi buah tangan yang diletakkan dalam beg tu, tapi Al quran memang menarik hati mereka. Kita?

Sketsa 2

Setelah selesai majlis makan, kami menghantar mereka balik semula ke asrama. Di dalam kereta Getz Moksu:

Moksu : Korang ni semua diam-diam je ke?

Pelajar Tahfiz 1 : Banyak cakap, gelap hati kak...

No more Hugs and Kisses

As some of you know 12 March now is officially my Anniversary and the Day Arwah Abah left us. And Arwah death certificate was registered on 14 March which falls on my Birthday. It was the saddest special day in my entire life. No more hugs and kisses from him. And no more "Happy Birthday, Yan".

It was so sweet of Fadhli and Ayu (my cousin in Melbourne) to bought a nice choc cake for us. But I can t stop crying thinking of how empty I will be after this.